Miles is a pretty sophisticated kid, and he’s good at pushing limits, so he’s talked me into letting him see a lot of movies that would appall many parents. I mostly consider the artistic merit of the movie he wants to see, and decide if seeing the movie together can deepen his understanding of film and also give us something to talk about. Through film we’ve been able to map out a context for discussions about drugs, sex, religion, spirituality, politics, and all sorts of things that a young man needs to know as he gets ready for the world (but may prove uncomfortable at times to discuss). Overall we have a great relationship and it helps a lot that I trust Miles not to see things behind my back.

Aside from showing him Fight Club at too young an age I don’t really regret any of the films we’ve screened together (and Fight Club remains one of his favorites — I just think I shared it with him a year or two early, and it also served to accelerate his teenaged tendency toward cynicism, which hasn’t been great). In truth, the list of movies I won’t share with him is pretty short … mostly “torture porn” movies like Saw (and pretty much every slasher/dead teenager movie, a genre I find without merit). I’ve also blacklisted A Clockwork Orange and Blue Velvet, both of which I think are great films but we just don’t need to go there yet (and Miles is all over me about A Clockwork Orange, because he’s a Kubrick nut).

And of course we watch plenty of movies that aren’t about blood and guts, too … recently we’ve seen American Beauty, Doctor Strangelove, Citizen Kane (at a screening, which was cool), Punchdrunk Love, and more I can’t remember right now. We’ve got an ever-growing list of pictures to see.

Drafting right behind Miles is Jack, 2.5 years younger with little of Miles’ interest in pushing limits (Jack skipped Dredd 3D last weekend while Miles and I were there first day). They’re so different.

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